Official blog for the book "Just Behind the Door"

Posts tagged ‘Confidence in Tomorrow’

Death, Taxes and Change

Death and taxes are said to be the only absolutes in life. I think we need to add change to this list since facing change is also an absolute. Change involves both endings and beginnings. Both have a great deal in common – losses and gains. The steps involved are consistent and predictable. As we face the new year let us embrace the changes ahead. By knowing about the emotional process of change it gives us greater confidence, a knowing that we can handle whatever life has in store. I find the following framework helpful in processing changes in my life. Hopefully, you will find it valuable as well.

Level 0 – We are not interested, prepared or expecting a change to happen. At first we may find ourselves in denial, anger or at least uncertainty. Is this really happening? Should I, must I – the what if’s begin to flood into our mind. Expanding our comfort zone can be unnerving.

Level 1 – The realization hits us that the change is likely. We may think we are not ready for it and fear enters our thinking. We think of all the downsides of the change, forgetting that ‘all is as it should be.’ We momentarily forget that the Universe doesn’t make mistakes.

Level 2 – Now the change is eminent. We ask ourself, ‘how will this DIRECTLY affect ME? ‘ We may worry, ‘can I really do this, cope with this and make it work?’ We go into survival mode, momentarily, wishing it would just go away. Gradually, sticking our toe in the water, we begin thinking more about the change and mentally ‘trying it on for size.’

Level 3 – At this step we accept the change and quickly want to know what and how to manage it. ‘What should I do first, second, and so on,’ we think to ourself, quickly trying to gain a sense of control. We may have moments of regret or worry but in our hearts we again strive to remember that ‘all is as it should be.’

Level 4 – Now we begin wondering or worrying about how the change will affect OTHERS in our life. We wonder what we can do to help them. Often, only time helps. They may not be experiencing any excitement or seeming advantage by the change so time is needed to let them get used to the idea and process through these steps.

Level 5 – We are now fully engage in the change and want to work with others to celebrate it. We are living with the benefits and challenges and gaining a sense of comfort with the process. It is exciting for us but others may still not be there yet. It’s okay. Loving support and the gift of time will continue to help. Everyone processes change in their own ‘right’ time.

Level 6 – Acceptance of the changes in our lives have become the new norm. We begin to gain more confidence in our ability to handle the next change that is inevitable in our life. We want to help others realize that they can also handle changes in their lives with patience, love and understanding.

Death, taxes and change are absolutes for all of us. They are part of the script we wrote before birth. There is a peace in knowing that!

Have a great few days and remember to embrace change in 2013!

Abundance or Limitation

The law of attraction is exact, precise. What ever you have in your life you have attracted it through continued thought. Have you ever watch a particular person and thought, they have the Midas touch. It seems like everything they do just turns out right, or in the case of Midas, it turns to gold. Actually, if you dig deeper you will find that this person works, plans, and refuses to accept anything that is not in their best interest. They believe in themselves and put the effort in to make their dreams a reality. If they have a set back they view it as simply a small hurdle that they will get over.

I have had the opportunity to watch a few people in my life that fit this category. What a ride they have had – against all odds they have succeeded. When you talk to them you discover that they have had their trials and tribulations like the rest of us. And yet, they refused to give in.They just made things happen it seems, at times, through sheer will.

What I have learned is that success truly does breed success. Small doses of reality, small events that enlarge one’s comfort zone, does make for a happier, more secure person. The world can be as small (limiting) or as large (ever expanding) as you so choose. The Universe will deliver what is foremost in your thoughts.

No one achieves peace, love or success without paying their dues. There are simply no ‘free passes.’ Life, love and loss is about lessons. Simply put, we chose the lessons and we, consequently, have to live out the experiences until we ‘get it.’

If you feel a change is necessary in your life, look first to what you are saying to yourself. Is it a message of fear, lack of … or any other limiting thought. If so. You might think about the energy you are giving out to the Universe. Remember, you will get back more of what you give out. I choose to give out the thought of ABUNDANCE.

What thoughts are occupying your mind – lack, fear or abundance?