Refuse the Shrink Wrap!
How many of us find that the older we get the more our lives seem to become smaller, as our comfort zone reduces in size until we become a walking add for a new product that could be titled, ‘Shrink Wrap Your Life For Greater Comfort, Security and Protection.’ In this scenario we find ourselves continually judging, complaining and ultimately rejecting any thoughts or ideas that are different from our own life experiences. This mindset is usually followed with the thought that ‘this new idea is uncomfortable to me and I reject it …end of story,’ as we begin to consciously pull the shrink wrap ever closer around us for temporary ‘comfort.’ The irony, of course, is that this type of ‘comfort’ causes us to become wary, insecure and just downright more difficult to be around. Can anyone spell curmudgeon?
Truth be told, as the years pass, unless we actively work against this tendency of living in the past it will infiltrate our very core and we will become less rather than more. To combat this hijacking of new life experiences or thoughts requires two things. First it takes an awareness that temporary discomfort may not be a bad thing and then a commitment to think more deeply about something before allowing ourselves to decide on its merit. Different isn’t automatically bad…simply different. Life is constantly changing and evolving. Are we up to the challenge of it all?
Visualize, if you will, an older version of yourself sitting comfortably in a rocking chair. Maybe your hair color has changed, and your physical energy is not what it used to be as you sit with a friend complaining that ‘things are just not the way they used to be.’ As you are speaking can you feel the energy ebbing away from you? Do you actually want to spend the remaining years rejecting the new and yearning for the past?
Every moment of our life is a choice – what we think, do and say is totally up to us. Yes, life is changing at a breakneck speed and we can choose to hold on and have the ride of our life or reminisce about an easier, slower time.
Our unconscious keeps a running record of all feelings and experiences in our lives. It is the depository of all of who we are … what we have done and learned to date. When something new or different comes along we find ourselves at a crossroad. Should I go left and accept or right and reject? This question confronts us on a continual basis – on the news, in our jobs simply every moment we are alive.
In reality, living life to the fullest requires that we slow down when confronted with a new or different thought and think about it long enough to seek the pros and cons of it. When we practice withholding judgment of the unfamiliar or feelings of discomfort we we may just find that there is something to be valued and learned from the experience.
The easiest thing in the world is to reject a new way of thinking. That takes zero intelligence! The goal of being a life long learner is to roll these new ideas or events around in our minds until we see the possible benefit rather than merely the challenge or discomfort. It increases our energy when we see our glass as half-full rather than half-empty.
Regardless of the lives we have lived, every day we are presented with something that has the potential to alter our comfort zone. Will we choose to pull the shrink wrap ever closer around us or be willing to say, ‘Why Not!’ and become more of everything…more interesting, more exciting and filled with wonder of what this marvelous place called earth has in store for us just around the corner. As always, the choice is up to us.
Have a great few days!
Be Above It!
How do you react when someone makes a subtle or not so subtle comment to you or someone else about something you believe in or have done? Often our first reaction is to strike back – either outright or in our head – and say or think something equally negative in return. Is it really worth it?
What if we practiced a different approach? What if we chose to be above it all. To decide that regardless of who, what or when something negative is said to remain in control of our feelings and refuse to let the negativity affect us. Difficult? Yes, but not impossible, if we practice this behavior over time. If we disagree with what is said, asking for clarification is helpful if – and only if – we can do so without anger, resentment or adding negative emotion to the environment.
When we really stop to think about it there are at least a million and one ways every day to be offended or upset due to the economy, world or national news, a hurtful comment, an envious coworker, or simply the energy given off by someone who is basically unhappy with themselves. These are just a few examples in which we may think, ‘There it goes again,’ as we feel ourselves being affected by the negativity.
When you run across someone who acts as if they know the way, the truth and the light, take a deep breath and realize that they are simply operating from their ego. They choose self-importance over understanding. To prove this point, just listen to their conversations and count the number of times they use the word ‘I’ versus ‘we’ – it’s a dead giveaway. You can almost here them thinking, ‘If you did things my way all would be right with the world.’ Not so much!
When we think it necessary to change or direct others it says more about us than them. Let’s remember that we are all on our own pathway and have unique lessons to learn. Judging others, regardless of how much they get under our skin, will only delay our own soul’s evolution. We can’t expect those who are different than us to think, feel or behave as we do. We all walk in shoes, specifically designed by us, for our journey.
Not allowing ourselves to be offended gives us strength and adds to our self-confidence. Choose to be simply an observer without judgment. You will gain much inner peace in the process. After all, no one is put into this world to live up to our expectations just as we are not put into this world to live up to theirs. Inner peace develops when we live at what we are For rather than AGAINST.
Have a great few days!