Official blog for the book "Just Behind the Door"

Posts tagged ‘Body Language’

The Energy of Human Touch

As I wrote in my book, ‘Just Behind The Door,’ energy cannot be created nor destroyed only changed in form. Understanding this concept is one thing but actually seeing or feeling it in action is another. When we walk into a room we can feel if others are welcoming us into their space. Beyond body language there is just this feeling that we get that tells us how other people are responding to our energy. It may be hard to fully explain and can’t actually be seen by the naked eye but without question we just know it – we can feel it in every cell of our bodies. Isn’t that amazing!

When we study energy and learn more about how energy can actually be enhanced through approaches such as Reiki it’s a humbling experience. Reiki practitioners are taught how to actually feel the energy of others with their hands and redirect it to help a person dislodge their own blocked energy. Reiki teaches us how to connect with the Universal Energy source and be a conduit to help others. It also allows the practitioners to attain a better energy flow in their own life as they consciously tap into the ever present energy that surrounds them.

Human touch truly is magical. It can help dry a child’s tears or let a loved one know we are there to help them when the going gets rough. When we take the time to hug someone or pat their arm to comfort them it is not merely a loving gesture. We are actually giving them energy often without realizing it. Yet, if we look closely we can see their eyes brighten as they begin to relax and breathe more deeply. Their shoulders relax and we can see the difference created from this infusion of energy. When we visit someone who is in need our presence is actually a gift of energy, carefully wrapped within the loving arms of kindness. From time to time we may hear people say they are hesitant to visit someone who has recently experienced a loss in their life because they don’t know what to say – yet in reality few words need to be exchanged because it is the energy exchange in the personal connection that is so valuable to a fellow traveler. At times it can be their life line.

We can see the beauty of this energy exchange especially with Hospice patients. As their own energy begins to fade over the course of their illness they begin to eagerly wait for their next Hospice visit. They just seem to intuitively know that they will receive the energy they need to face another day. We can’t extend their life but we can make the days that they have left just a little bit better by our presence.

Take a moment to observe the vital importance of human contact in all walks of your life and you will arrive at a deeper awareness that it is really the exchange of energy that is at the heart of the matter. It makes all the difference.

Have a great few days!

Overcoming Our Pressure Points

My last blog talked about how our walk speaks volumes. As part of the whole topic of body language which has been said to constitute 55% of the first impression we give to others an awareness of this is important. Let’s dig a little deeper into the topic of the messages we give off to others by considering the soles of our feet. Sound strange? Just stay with me on this one.

The soles of our feet stretch from our heels to our toes. They have experienced millions of miles on our journey through life. We have seen the machines that when stepped on show us the hot spots or greater pressure points that we have developed on our journey. Suggested orthotic shoe inserts, different shoes or even specific exercises are then recommended to us ease our pain. From our walk, stance and daily activities all have had an impact on the soles of our feet. We can become slow, stiff even weak because of the pain we have accumulated in life until we choose to deal with the pain – head on – and overcome it.

When you think about it there is something significant about the words sole and soul other than purely sound. Actually, the soles of our feet are a good analogy to our spiritual souls. Each of us have unique hot spots, retraction points and pressure issues that we have come to accept as a normal part of living. Some of us accept the challenges or pains we have accumulated in our hearts as just something we have to endure. Rather than limping with bad feet we retract our energy (a form of limping through life) when we choose not to deal with our issues directly. This causes us to bring less enthusiasm, excitement and fun into our lives for fear of being hurt or uncomfortable. We believe that we are protecting our unique hot spots.

The nonstop change process that we are living in today can send some of us running for cover, locking the doors trying to prevent the changes from disrupting our lives. Yet, and here is the kicker, the harder we try to hide from change and not deal with our ‘hot spots’ that we have acquired on our souls the greater our ‘limp’ becomes in life. Visualize it on a scale from limping, to using a cane or ultimately not even being able to walk. Why? Because we have chosen not to recognize the individual pressure points on our souls. We choose to ignore rather than deal with them proactively. Consequently, the tenderness continues to grow and our spiritual limp becomes more visible and more limiting.

No one comes into this life or lives it without accumulating areas of tenderness or hot spots that need to be worked through to becomes more fully functioning human beings. It is not a question or ‘if’ but ‘when’ we take on the challenge.

If fear of anything is controlling your behavior it is a signal from the Universe. It’s time to deal with it rather than pass. Deciding to use a crutch to sustain us will not achieve less pain but simply start us on a path of greater and greater dependency. Recognizing the fear – the issue for what it is is 75% of overcoming it. You are strong enough and wise enough to overcome anything once you choose to do so. We know that the Universe gives back to us exactly what we give out – no more no less. Choose to embrace your individual pressure points or hot spots and recognize them for what they are … simply an opportunity for growth and greater happiness. You can do it!

Have a great few days!

Forgiveness and Moving On

Do you ever think about a particular person and feel anger, resentment, or even rage? Be honest with yourself and really think about it. If you feel that you have been hurt, rejected or even emotionally attacked by another in your past it is hard to let go of it. Each time the person’s name comes up or you even think of that person, you may feel tense, hostile or even a seething inside you. Check out your body language. Your eyes, face, even voice intonation says it all. When that person’s name comes up it is easy to see if you are still holding on to negative energy surrounding the situation.

In my book, Just Behind the Door, I talk about past hurts as if they were a backpack we are caring around. Every time we think about a particular event or person and feel emotionally stressed by the remembering, it is, as if, you are actually experiencing the event again. It adds another rock to your backpack making it heavier for you to carry. I can visualize a person hunched over from the weight of past hurts struggling to put one foot in front of the other. The weight of the world seems to be on their shoulders and they seem to be a magnet that attracts more negatives in their life day after day.

Forgiveness releases the hold, the weight we are carrying. It doesn’t mean that we don’t remember past hurts. But rather we remember them without emotionally getting hooked into the negative feelings associated with them. You might be thinking that what happened wasn’t right or fair. In reality, what you lived through was PLANNED by YOU for this lifetime to teach you some valuable life lessons. When you can look back and release the anger associated with the experience and forgive yourself AND the other person you will have learned the lessons you set out to learn. It is not easy to emotionally let it go but it is extremely important to do so. Until those particular lessons are learned and your mind and heart lets go of the anger, similar situations will continue to surface in your life. When you accept responsibility for the choices you made for this lifetime and let go of the anger towards others, you exhale deeply, your shoulders relax and you view the person or situation in terms of ‘life lessons learned.’

The noise in our minds fueled by negative remembrances drowns out the sounds of love and forgiveness from the Universe. It keeps us locked on, like a GPS, to a path that will attract more of the same. Our minds and hearts can be filled with either love or fear. If you find it impossible to forgive a particular person, force yourself to look at what you truly feared most about the past circumstance involving them. Fear is the operative word here. That fear is your lesson in disguise.

We can live a life of love, acceptance and abundance or remain stuck, reliving the hurts of yesterday and attracting more negative energy into our lives. The choice is always up to us.

Have a great few days!