Official blog for the book "Just Behind the Door"

Posts tagged ‘God/Universal Energy’

Visualize Your Tomorrows!

There are people that make things happen and those that wait for things to happen in their lives. Which one are you? The secret to making things happen in your life is to form a detailed mental picture of what you want and repeatedly visualize it in your mind AND feel it in your heart. The emotional component is what really makes the visualization become a reality. It goes beyond simply wishing or hoping for something. With visualization you see it in your mind and mentally try it on for size, adjusting slightly until it’s a perfect fit. Sound easy? It can be once you believe that you are entitled to all the happiness in life you desire.

An example of how to make creative visualization work for you could be to ‘pretend’ you are looking for a different car. What do you want it to look like, drive like? How many miles on the odometer are you willing to accept? How does it feel when you get behind the wheel to drive? How much are you willing to pay for it? See yourself signing the contract for the amount you are willing to pay and driving it with a big smile on your face. Visualize and FEEL it day after day. Know that it will happen. Keep experiencing the ‘feel’ of the car and sooner than you realize it will happen.

After achieving whatever initial visualization you have put out to the Universe, you may want to apply this process to other parts of your life. What, for example, would your life look like if you felt whole, perfect and complete? That is a much deeper thought but it is so important to realize the process of visualizing is the same. Can you actually see in your mind and feel in your heart how things would be different for you than they are now? The first step is to think about those differences and recognize them. What you have versus what you want takes mental and emotional work. It is hard work at first because it is repetitive and you have to suspend any disbelief you have that the process will work. Just like everything we do in life it takes work. This is just a different kind of work from what you might be used to doing. The phrase, ‘fake it ’till you make it’ applies in visualization.

At our core, we are all made up of energy. Remember the phrase, ‘like attracts like?’ So it is with the energy of the Universe. There is negative or positive energy in our thinking, being, doing. What are you drawing into your own energy field? You can harness positive energy to make your dreams a reality through the practice of visualization or simply wait, passively, and let things happen to you. The choice is always up to you. The Universe provides to us whatever is foremost in our thinking.

Even with the lessons that we have agreed to learn in our prebirth agreements, we still have the power of free will in the how’ we learn those lessons. It’s rather like the choice of pulling or pushing a wagon. One way is easier than the other and yet the wagon still is moved. I believe the power in the Universe can be harnessed through our ability to visualize what we want to have, achieve, and be in our lives.

When things challenge us, hurt us or loss happens there is a point at which we may see it and wonder why, demanding that this not be happening, or we can look it straight in the eye and refuse to be altered in our belief that things happen for a reason. We can use the power of visualization and get through it and learn from it, ultimately becoming stronger in the process or not. Our viewpoint is a critically important part of our gift of free will. We can harness the power of positive energy through visualization. The choice is always up to us.

The phrase s… happens, is true for all of us. Also true is the thought, ‘ what I do about it is totally up to me.’ What a gift we have been given with free will! Give visualization a chance. What do you have to lose?

All IS AS IT SHOULD BE – REALLY?

A dear friend called to talk about the blog from Wednesday. She said, “I can accept what you are saying in the blog … all, that is, but the last statement, All is as it should be.” She went on to explain that we may have free will but the lack of ownership by others for their life and their lessons have a compounding effect on those of us close to them. I agreed, but once again repeated, what do YOU need to learn from these situations involving others. She made a great point. I know what I mean when I repeat the statement, “All is as it should be,” and those of you who have read my book, Just Behind the Door, understand that this has been THE ongoing statement that my son, from the other side, has communicated for over a decade. It makes so much sense to me but I have lived through this communication with Ronnie for so long that it is natural. So to be clearer about the intent in the phrase let me explain.

I believe each of us agrees, pre-birth, on the lessons we will work on in this lifetime. The themes are numerous, but to list just a few: emotional independence, overcoming feelings of powerlessness or unworthiness, overcoming our fears, forgiveness, gratitude, unconditional love, the list goes on and on. We agree to experience situations in our life that will help us learn the lessons we have chosen to learn. The challenges that are presented in learning these lessons can take us to the brink of denial, anger, rebellion, withdrawal even total helplessness until we finally get it, recognize it and learn from it. Remember no one but YOU agreed to work on the lessons that you are dealing with in your life. It is, as if, first God/Universal Energy whispers, (this is the first time the lesson is presented) then speaks ( a similar, more dramatic experience presented a second time) then shouts with an even more difficult, challenging situation the third (or more) time the lesson surfaces. The experiences just keep adding up, causing us tremendous hurt and challenge until, one day, we GET IT. There is no one to blame, no one to rail at because we chose to work on the particular lesson(s) until we internalize the learning.

I have experienced the death of two husbands, my son, two sisters, mother, father and close friends. In addition, I have experienced divorce – more than once. For each experience, I railed at the Universe. Why me? What have I done wrong? I demanded that the situation be different. I felt I should be able to fix it, if I just tried hard enough. Gradually, as I learned more, an “aha” happened. Now, I realize that my life is about accepting that I cannot control everything, to have greater faith in God/Universal Energy and, along the way, to learn to love myself. I guess I was a remedial learner who needed to experience many losses to finally get it!

So, when I say, “All is as it should be,” it is. When we look back – hindsight is always 20/20 – we have a greater awareness, if not acceptance, as to the why.

What lesson are you working on?

Independence Day!

The 4th of July is all about our freedom in the U.S. There are so many countries in this world where it is not possible to recognize individual freedom. We are, indeed, fortunate. So many people who came before us made tremendous life sacrifices just to be sure that we would be a country that values individual freedom. I am humbled by their vision, dedication to the cause and effort to make it a reality. They made sure that we would have the opportunity to live in a land that celebrates the uniqueness of each person.
I had the rare opportunity to celebrate this year with my extended family in Michigan. All 47+ of us enjoyed a day sharing, laughing and playing together at one of the local lakes. As the hours wore on, it was evident that each of us really didn’t want the day to end. It was just one of those perfect days. As I watched each of them, I thought about how grateful I was to God/Universal Energy for their presence in my life. As a group they reflect a slice of the American dream. Each are so unique and yet are all working to improve their lives one day at a time. Wow! It doesn’t get much better than that!
The freedom we experience in our county allows us to learn, develop and live our lives to the fullest. We have the opportunity to make our life and the life of others a little better everyday just by taking the time to connect and show that we care. Caring about yourself was not something my generation was taught to do. Being selfless was rather the norm. So,I have had to learn all about taking care of self first. What a challenging lesson it has been! Yet, we learn as we become older that in order to help others and change the world we must take care of ourselves first. Some of us need ‘permission’ to put ourselves first. Well, here you have it – during this Independence Week – please take care of yourself – do something special just for you. Why? Because, YOU deserve it. As Dr. Seuss in his famous story said, You are a unique being, the number 1 genuine article. There really will never be another you. So celebrate our freedom and celebrate the freedom to be you. You will feel more energized and tomorrow will seem even brighter. Tonight, before going to bed, think about something you can do just for you and remember why it is possible – because our forefathers worked to make the world a little better place.

Have a great few days!

Are We Managers or Leaders of Our Life?

I read a statement the other day that resonated with me. ‘Real living begins where your comfort zone ends.’ For some, the idea of purposely putting yourself into a totally new situation, taking that leap of faith and moving beyond what is comfortable, normal and predictable may seem frightening. I would call these folks MANAGERS of their lives. They don’t want to change anything because they fear the unknown. These same people might even comment that, at times, their lives seem boring. Really? Doing (and thinking) the same thing over and over could, indeed, be boring. To allow your life to be controlled through fear reduces your opportunities to learn, grow and fully experience life on planet Earth. Fear eliminates possibilities in your life and can encapsulates you in a cocoon of predictability. The longer you live in an environment of fear the tighter the cocoon grows around you. If you notice people who get upset easily when a change happens in their life, or something doesn’t go the way they expected it, you can almost see the invisible cocoon of fear enveloping them tighter and tighter. Their fear speaks louder than their voice.

Conversely, there are people who embrace the inevitable changes and challenges in their lives. They have decided to be a LEADER of their life rather than a manager. They realize that, at its core, life is all about change. Every day and in every way things are changing around us. We cannot stop or even control the speed of change. These people, realizing they have free will, choose to look for the positives in the changes presented in their life. A hint about identifying these specific people is to look in their eyes. You will see a little spark of possibility, even excitement evident. They seem comfortable in their own skin.

When we embrace the unknown, realizing that everything happens for a purpose, as my son has told me in my book, Just Behind the Door, it puts us in the driver’s seat rather than the passenger’s seat of life. We recognize that there is something bigger than ourselves in the Universe – and it is good. Whatever name you choose to call it, God/Universal Energy or … (fill in the blank) we are a part of this Power and it will deliver to us what we think about most often. Nothing more and nothing less. Believing this makes it easier to let go of fear, embrace the changes that happen, and truly welcome the wonderful opportunities yet to unfold in our lives.

Synchronicity – God/Universal Energy is at Work!

Today is the 13th anniversary of my son, Ronnie’s death. So many friends and family remembered (including my grandboys) that caused me to feel both grateful and overwhelmed. If you have gotten the chance to read the book, Just Behind the Door, you won’t be surprised by the next few sentences. The publishing house emailed me and verified that my copies (40 softcover and 20 hardcovers) would be delivered soon for upcoming book talks. Synchronicity, as defined by Carl Jung means the simultaneous occurrence of events that are meaningfully related. In other words, things happening that seem rather coincidental but have a certain common theme or effect and time. Well, once again, the synchronicity in my life continues. The books were delivered to my door TODAY, on the anniversary of his death. Thank you to God/Universal Energy and Ronnie for reiterating to me the message that unconditional love is forever.

For those of you who remember the artist, Carly Simon, she produced a song in the ’70’s entitled, “Haven’t Got Time For the Pain.” Although we would all like to believe it to be true, the reality is that certain days trigger memories of unconditional love and unconditional loss. The pain, once again, comes flooding into our consciousness. It is important to honor and hold both the pain and love in our hearts during these times. Denial of the feelings involved in loss or grief forces the hurt to bury itself deeper into our psyche. It is both mentally and physically unhealthy to keep it buried. A loss, as painful as it is, can be an opportunity for us to connect to the real truth in our lives. Our loved ones are always around us and ready to help and offer encouragement from the other side. Just remember they have 20/20 hindsight and foresight. The lyrics of Carly’s song, “I haven’t got time… room.. or need for the pain” sounds rather cold. But if you listen further to the song, it is a confirmation of everything I write about in the book. “You showed me how.. to leave myself behind …and turn down the noise in my mind… Suffering was the only thing that made me feel I was alive…’Til you showed me how, to fill my heart with love and to open up and drink in all that white love pouring down from heaven.” When you hear songs that resonate with you, there is a reason.

I again say thank you to all of you who have been emailing and calling me after reading the book. Some of you have even written while you were still in the middle of reading it! I am humbled and thankful that it is helping so many people think about the loss of a loved in a larger context. One of the quotes from Ronnie in the book is so fitting, “Everyone needs to know that nothing dies. The spirit, the soul lives on. Love and communication continues, forever, if people will open themselves up to it.”

Let that last sentence roll around in your mind for awhile. The truth will present itself to you.

Until next time, have a loving and joyful week.

A Mother’s Love

Happy Mother’s Day to all of you! To some, this gift has been cut short and it makes this holiday, in particular, a difficult one to get through. If you know of someone who has lost a child regardless of their age, or how long ago it was, please take a moment to call, email or simply say a little prayer for them. Healing takes time – sometimes an entire lifetime.

In my blog last Wednesday I thanked President Obama for taking the stand he did on same sex marriage. I want to thank you for your PHENOMENAL response! Your emails and calls saying, “I agree with you” were appreciated. I would encourage you to make your own voice known on the topic to someone. It is both important and courageous to speak from your heart. It gives others ideas that may differ from their own. The world is changed for the better – often, one person at a time.

It is hard to understand a different perspective when you are surrounded with thinking that simply reflects your own opinion. When we seek diverse material, books, and people it gives us food for thought and expands our understanding of the world. Who have you listened to this week that gave you a different perspective to consider?

We will know we have become the great county we have the potential to be when we move from tolerance and acceptance to recognition, honor and love for all of our fellow human beings, regardless of their skin color, cultural background, sexual orientation or belief system.

My son, from the other side, has told me in my book, Just Behind the Door, “Life can be its own gift or its own undoing. It all revolves around developing one’s consciousness about ourselves and how unconditional love allows the communication from our loved ones to continue forever.” There is that thought again, unconditional love, it is what we are all here to learn.

The current events in our world can be mind-boggling . The lessons I have learned in my 40 plus years of study on spiritualism helps me peal away the layers of misunderstanding and judgment to reveal their significance and truth. We are all part of God/Universal Energy. We all deserve to be recognized as such.

It is said that there is no greater love than the love a mother has for her child. Let’s try to tap into that love this week and practice acceptance of all people who are working to develop their own expanded consciousness in this classroom called life.

Virtues and Reasons for Life Challenges

The 27 Divine Virtues that Robert Schwartz talked about in his lecture, is to help us to determine what particular areas we are working on in this lifetime. Usually 3-5 seem to pop out as areas that are the most difficult for us to accept, believe in or practice. Going more deeply into the why we may have chosen particular virtues to work on, he has discovered 4 main reasons. They are explained in greater depth in his book, Your Soul’s Gift.

He first talks about KARMA. He defines karma differently. He feels it is not a ‘cosmic debt’ that we are trying to repay but rather as something our soul needs to experience to more fully understand the emotional lessons involved in fully learning the virtue. He further explains that karma can be for 1 of 2 reasons. Balancing or releasing. Balancing our karma is when we have purposely designed life lessons to help us experience all emotional sides or an issue for deeper understanding. The result then, is a 360 degree view of the virtue. You really, really get it at that point. Releasing, on the other hand, is achieved when we finally understand the underlying root cause of the imbalance and can release it. For instance, if a person looks at life as if the cup is half empty, scarcity or the fear of not having enough of something, may be at the root cause. FEAR of … (you fill in the word) is usually the cause of our imbalances in life. Once we truly internalize that anything (including fear) that we give emotional energy to, we are actually drawing more of it to us, we will stop. If you don’t want scarcity in your life stop dwelling on it. Think abundance and believe that there is more than enough in this Universe for everyone. Refuse to be crippled by fear of anything!

The second reason Schwartz feels that we may have planned certain challenges in our life is for HEALING. He explains that when we have unresolved negative energy from a previous lifetime (such as anger, guilt, blame, judgment of self and/or others) we may plan specific life issues to live through that involve these exact feelings so that we can heal ourselves from inside out and achieve greater understanding and peace.

Schwartz believes the third reason we may have chosen our life challenges is for SERVICE TO OTHERS. The phrase is self explanatory. We know that what we give, we receive and what we teach, we learn. He says that this area, service to others is an ‘accelerated path’ of spiritual growth. Remember the phrase, pay it forward? It applies here, for sure. When we remember that we are all part of God/Universal energy and when we help others we are also helping ourselves, the impact becomes that much greater.

He feels a fourth reason for our challenges on this earth is for CONTRAST. My understanding is that on earth we experience an intensity of emotional experiences. No kidding! We are in a classroom of nonstop learning! So our opportunity for growth (to become a better person) is greater. It makes me think of the fairy tale by Hans Christian Anderson, The Princess and the Pea. Even under 20 mattresses she was able to feel the pea. Her physical/emotional awareness was so heightened from her experience as a princess. On earth, since our challenges are so vast and difficult, our own physical and emotional growth is heightened which allows us to develop a higher level of functioning and understanding.

Have you found anything from his work that seems to speak to you? I hope so.

STAY TUNED – ON MY NEXT BLOG ON WEDNESDAY, I WILL SHARE WITH YOU ABOUT MY BOOK. IT IS NOW AVAILABLE!